Friday, April 16, 2010

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

من أين؟

لا تنتقد خجلي الشـديد .. فإنني بسيطة جــدا … وأنت خبير .. يا سيد الكلمات .. هبني فرصة حتى يذاكر دروســه العصفور .. خذني بكل بساطتي ..وطفولتي أنا لم أزل أصبـــو ..وأنت كبيــــر . أنا لا أفرّق بين أنفى أو فمي في حين أنت على النساء قدير .. من أين تأتى بالفصاحة كلهـــا.. وأنا .. يموت على فمي التعبيــر أنا في الهوى لا حول لي أو قوة إن المحبّ بطبعـــه مكســــور . إني نسيت جميع ما علمتني في الحب فاغفر لي وأنت غفور يا واضع التاريخ .. تحت ســريره يا أيها المتشاوف المغـــرور . يا هادئ الأعصاب ..أنك ثابت وأنا ..على ذاتي أدور ..أدور .. الأرض تحتي دائما محروقة والأرض تحتك مخمل وحرير .. فرق كبير بيننا يا سيدي فأنا محافظـــة .. وأنت جســـور وأنا مقيّدة .. وأنت تطيـــــر .. وأنا محــجّبة .. وأنت بصيــــر .. وأنا .. أنا .. مجهـــولة جدا .. وأنت شهير .. فرق كبير بيننا .. يا سيدي فأنا الحضارة والطغاة ذكور .. من شعر سعاد الصباح وغناء نجاة

Thursday, April 08, 2010

من قصة لم تكتمل

و لتبقى دوما في قلبي... محفورا بداخلي كما حفر أجدادنا المصريون تاريخهم العظيم على جدران المعابد القديمة... شامخا كأهرام مصر تتحدى الزمن... صامدا كنيلها الخالد تنثر الحياة في جنبات نفسي كما ينثر الحياة في أرضها... تضيء كوني كشمسها الساطعة... تجرفني كرياحها الحاملة عبق الاف السنين فأنسى من أنا... تبتلعني كصحرائها الشاسعة ولا أجد نفسي الا معك يا صحرائي وواحتي... وبين ذراعيك تتحدد معالمي وأرى خارطتي وأعرف طريقي... ولتبقى دوما أجمل الناس... يا كل الناس...

Sunday, March 07, 2010

Another Beautiful Face

For him, she is just another beautiful face that will need some more time to be in his bed. For her, he was the world...

Pain

He always complains that she keeps her troubles to herself. He never understands that sometimes talking about the pain hurts more than the wound itself...

Monday, January 11, 2010

Perfume

His wife couldn't understand why he got mad when she washed his blue scarf. It was the only thing that carried the perfume she used to wear before they got married.

Saturday, January 09, 2010

Unsaid!

Only one word from her could have made him cancel all his plans and stay. Only one word from him could have made her say the word he had been waiting for.

The Answer

He asked her "Are you really happy with me?" She looked in his eyes and said "Yes... yes I am" It was the first time she ever gave him a clear answer.

The First Night

She asked him "Do you remember our first night together?" Genuinely shocked, he asked her "It's the first time I hear you talk openly about our intimate rela..." She ignored his comment and interrupted him saying "It was the only time you carried me!"

Monday, December 28, 2009

Absurd!

He said "So it is really Egypt! They are building the Goddamn wall!". She said "I can't believe she's finally getting a new home". It was their 37th anniversary.

Postponed!

They have been sitting silently for an hour, starring at their empty cups. Suddenly he said "I don't think I can live without yo..". She didn't wait for him to finish the word, she said "Neither can I!".

I do!

He looked at her with his deep green eyes. Rays of piercing light radiated from his eyes into her. She looked down feeling the hot flush of blood on her face. He didn't say a word and he didn't ask her any question. Without saying a word she stole a quick look at him that said "I do".

Unforgiven!

She could have forgiven him for the slap, only if he ran to her and took her in his arms when she fell on the floor.

A Hug!

He was lying beside her in their bed, asleep, deeply asleep. She moved closer to him and placed his silent arm around her body. She only enjoys his hug when he is asleep.

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

A Story Without A Start!

She saw his number on her mobile screen in the middle of a hectic work day; it has been almost two months since they have last met. Close friends they keep calling themselves in their personal conversations, online chats and in front of common friends and everyone. The major differences in their characters and in the way they view things can make them nothing but rivals, but his fiery nature that only her smooth understanding and high tolerance for the other could sooth made them close in a way, nothing more than friends, or so she thought until she got his call.
***
- Her: Finally you are in Cairo, man I pity your family, are you ever gonna settle down a bit?

- Him: No never, you know me better than anyone, put me in one place more than two weeks and you will lose me forever.

- Her: My God, it’s not even getting better by age, is it?

- Him: Nope, never. So tell me, what have you been up to?

- Her: Nothing much, work, work and work, it has been stressful lately

- Him: Yeah, as if it has been better before, have you ever been free since you started this business?

- Her: Actually no, you are right, but at least I’m around, a phone call away, unlike those who spend most of their time in airports.

- Him: Ok someone is talking about me, well, I’m in Cairo this week and probably the week after, what are you doing on Tuesday after work of course?

- Her: Nothing, I don’t think I’ve got anything after work .

- Him: What about dinner?

- Her: Sounds great.

- Him: Ok, so we talk again on Tuesday to confirm time and place.

- Her: Perfcet! At last we’ll get a chance to talk, it has been so long I miss talking to you, I need the energy you induce in me with your flamboyant stories.

- Him: Yes, and I need to tell you some news.

- Her: Tell me, another promotion?

- Him: No, actually I’m dating.

- Her: Really!

- Him: Yes, I think it’s serious, anyway I have to go, will tell you all about it when we meet. Take care

- Her: Bye
***

A lump in your throat

A cold hand squeezing your heart

Something you’ve never thought

Why are you torn apart?

Yes, you care about him the most

But you will never go for the dart

The happiness he has always brought

Can make your life a work of art

But in his life you cannot get caught

You know you’ll never be his part

Wasn’t this what you’ve been taught?

If you can’t end it then don’t start

***
Monday evening. An unsent message saved in the drafts folder of her mobile phone:

“I know it sounds crazy but...I think I feel jealous! I don’t have any reason or explanation for this, I know you see me as boring, naïve and depressing, and I know we didn’t promise each other anything but I can’t help it, I just can’t”

***
Tuesday morning. A message from her:

“I’m sorry I won’t be able to make it today, A friend of mine is getting married in 10 days and needs me for some errands, I’ll be busy till the wedding, sorry dear. Take care and good luck with your date”

Monday, November 09, 2009

El Masriyeen.... Rag3een!

Do you remember songs like "Mashya El Sanyoora", "Ya Mama Setto", "Mate7seboosh ya Banat" and "3'anno Lel7ayah" that we used to listen to when we were children, with their funny lyrics, cheerful music and the amount of energy and life they used to inject in us whenever we listened to them? They all belong to El Masriyeen band that was filling the radio and TV with their music and lovely songs in the Eighties, lead by the composer Hany Shenouda and many members as musicians and singers with lovely voice. Yesterday I had the chance to attend their first come back concert in Cairo that was held in Wekalet El Ghoury in old Cairo. Listening to their songs I suddenly went back to when I was 5 or 6, and recalled how I loved their songs and used to knew them by heart and laugh my heart out with their funny clips. Now, 25 years later I was surprised to see myself still remembering the lyrics by heart, singing with the music without missing a word and getting back that same old feeling of pure, absolute, unconditional and untouched happiness that only children could feel. The performance was great, the whole band members are so down to earth and I felt as if I knew them already for so long, they were not just singers and musicians doing their job, they were friends, family, relatives. It was obvious that they all have a magical harmony with each other, and whenever Hany Shenouda speaks it is of the simplest, sincere and sweet words, I simply loved the man and his work. He was still on his very same old place on the keyboard, sending passionate looks of love and support to every single member on the band, giving full credit to all of them that I felt he is more of a loving father than a band leader. I couldn't help but going to him after the concert, and over a sincere hug and pair of kisses I thanked him for bringing me back those wonderful feelings that I thought were gone for good and for showing me that happiness can still come in something as simple as a song that is carfeuly written, composed and performed with lots of passion and talent. The band now has three very talented young singers, Fady, Afaf and Ayman who are just sweet and lovely, I couldn't take my eyes off their lovely faces that were hosting unremovable sweet smiles even after the concert ended. After a very long clapping session and a friendly chat with Hany and some of his lovely team, I went back home driving my car in the streets of Cairo and suddenly things seemed better, I didn't mind the dirty buildings, the ugly streets, the chaotic traffic or the people's attitude, for my heart was elsewhere and my ear could hear nothing but the happy music and lovely voices. That was exactly how I felt when I watched "Mamma mia" the musical that kept me happy for days and that I kept it in my list of antidepressants and happiness-enducing things :) Now El Masriyeen band will give their next concert in El Sakia on Wednesday Nov 18th, so I strongly rcommend that you go and get back some of that wonderful time that we all lost for growing up and living in this crazy life.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Our Great History!

Do you agree with me that a great history of thousands of years that is not preserved, not supported by a matching present and signs for a bright future is simply useless and talking about it is pathetic? To me, it is like a very old ugly dirty woman who is bragging about how she was Miss Universe years and years ago. Egyptians were the most intelligent people, they marvelled the world with their achievements and they taught humanity almost everything from buidling to agriculture to ethics and religions ... Yes, twe were great. Did you notice the past tense in the above phrase? Sad isn't it? And depressing, at least to me! I am personally against building the ".....est" things to claim your position in civilization, Dubai for example is always building the tallest, the biggest...etc and although I don't like Dubai and with all the horrors of Cairo and the hate and grudge I carry for it, I would still live there than spend a week in dubai, but you know what, every time I go there I get more and more impressed. yes they do not have history or past, they did not build pyramids or kept the bodies of their deads till now, but they are booming, the city is very clean and organised, life there is very easy, Dubai airpport is the best I have ever seen, even airports in Europe do not match it, it takes you literally 3 minutes to finish all the procedures, everywhere you are greeted, helped, welcomed and you feel you are like a very welcome and loved guest....well, I am proud of them. And let our 7000 years of civilization bring us clean air, drinkable water and sewage free fruits and vegetables, let it bring us safety while walking in the street and let us bring it the feeling of belonging that was lost long ago, let it bring us the basics of life that we cannot find in our own country although we find them given to everyone wherever we go.

Sunday, August 16, 2009

Nostalgia Europea!

Dear Europe,
I've been with you for two weeks, two full weeks, walking in your streets, breathing your air, drinking your water, filling my eyes with all your beauty that never ceases to amaze me and filling my soul with the life I have there that never ceases to make me feel alive. Yes, my dear Europe, I only feel alive with you, alone, without a familiar face, speaking your languages and living in places far away from home and from my beloved family and friends, but still the love that you give me makes me feel fulfilled and happy, a kind of happiness that no one else could give me.
When I first saw you, it was Paris, and it was the time I realized that I belong to you, the week I spent there showed me what happiness really is, what basics of life I miss and I didn't know that I missed unless I had them with you. I could breath a clean fresh air that I never have where I come from, I drank clean water from the tap, something I stopped doing since I was a young boy because the water coming from the taps where I live is not clean and cannot be drunk by humans, I found there a beautiful river, very clean that I could see under the water, accessible that I can walk by it and bend to get some of its water. I found old buildings that carry history of centuries and still look elegant, clean and extremely beautiful. I found greenery wherever I went as if it is a part of the daily life, while I rarely see a tree where I come from. I saw people who have beauty as part of their life, they care for it and would do anything to keep it, people who respect each other and do not care what the others look like, wear or say, I found peace and calmness, I found all what I never thought I needed until I went there. On my way back, in the airport I was crying, I felt as if I was parting from the only happiness I ever had, and I promised you to come back.
Then I lived in Germany for three months, which I see now as the best days of my life. Living there I became sure that my love to you is strong, deeply rooted in me and will stay as long as I live. I came to you with a sore heart and you treated me, and what else can be the best treatment for a wounded heart than being with you. There, I worked, lived, went to places, met people, made friends and with every day there, your love was growing inside me, like a tree that will not be uprooted unless my life ends. And when I went back to where I came from, I had this severe depression, this longing to you and to the days I lived with you, for the first time I was nostalgic to a place that I do not belong to. But don't I belong to you? Is home where you live, where you carry a document stating your nationality that you never relate to, just a dumb word that does not induce any feeling in your heart? Isn't home supposed to be where you feel home, where you feel happy and where you feel that you want to spend the rest of your life there?
Only then I decided that any vacation will be with you, only you, and since then I have been saving all the money that I can to spend it with you, for only with you I feel that money is made to be spent. Who said that money does not buy happiness, the money that I spend to pay for my trips to you give me happiness that is incomparable to anything I have ever felt.
Paris, Chartres, London, Berlin, Cologne, Bonn, Dusseldorf, Brussels, Amsterdam, Munich, Zurich, Zermatt, Madrid, Barcelona, Granada, Cordoba, Seville, Salzburg, Vienna, Venice, Verona, Prague, Karlovy Vary... Every one of your beautiful cities has given me its best and greeted me with its beautiful greenery. Each city soothed my heart with its beauty, fed my soul with its well-kept history and art and showed me its best, its very best. Like a mother proud of your children, wanting them to always be perfect and present them to the whole world in pride and glory, you presented your cities to me and I loved them all, every one of them has engraved its place in my heart and left a mark in my soul. And now, my dear Europe, I wouldn't be exaggerating when I say that you are my mother, the mother of my soul. You love me and care for me like a mother, whenever I come to you you give me the happiness that I never found anywhere else, you sooth my pains and comfort me. The smile you put on my face vanishes as soon as I leave you. The feeling of relief and belonging only comes to me when I am with you. Your rain cleanses my soul, your rivers tell me what beauty is, your green mountains showed me my home and the snow that covers you in winter made my eyes see a clearer picture of who I am. Yes, for my soul you are the only mother.
I am a product of you, my dear Europe, your painters, authors, poets, philosophers, composers and historical figures all enlightened me and made me what I am, every one of them, every single work that one of your children has made was a lesson to me, a journey of knowledge, I grew up with them, I walked their footsteps and I learned from them all, Your history was my best teacher and your literature was where I learned to feel and write, your paintings have taught me to appreciate art and beauty and your music is one of the things that keep me alive where I live away from you. I wouldn't have been the man I am now without you, without your children. Without your love.
I have parted from you my dear mother, but I will come again, with a smiling cheerful face that is rarely seen where I live, with a loving heart open to you and to your gifts that you generously offer me, with eyes that will never get enough of your beauty because they only see beauty in you. I will come to you and hug your trees, kiss your buildings, pray in your cathedrals, and dream of the day I get united with you for the end of my life...

Thursday, June 04, 2009

Of failure in getting out of my shell/ A horrible experience with Omar & Salma

Ok, this might be offending to some people, especially those who like "comedy" and Negm el geel "Tamer Hosny" so if you're one of those, please stop reading now and delete this mail from your list, I am not intending to take back anything mentioned here. Based on a very stressful mood I am in due to work load, work problems, Exams, summer and others, and based on a strong recommendation from my boss -who is one of my very close friends- to "get out of my shell, my comfort zone, have more acceptance for others, develop some tolerance, get close to our consumers and what they watch and read, get down from my ivory tower and live on earth even if I don't like many things surrounding me" bla bla bla... and based on a request from two dear colleagues to go out with them and "totally plan the outing, we trust it will be good" I decided to go for a movie "Omar and Salma" after a nice dinner. While shocked from my choice, my colleagues agreed happily that finally Meto will fight his deppression and go do something cheerful. So we went.... What a horrible movie, what a waste of time and money, not mention, my nerves.... my poor nerves that are already eroded on daily bases from many things. I went home after the movie cursing everything and everyone related to it even the usher who took us to our seats! Yes when I'm angry I go extreme. Now why do I call the movie horrible, here are some of the things that annoyed me more than you can ever imagine: - The whole movie is lacking quality in every single aspect, the script appears like a group of friends were having a cool "2a3da" and they decided "matyalla ne3mel film tahyees keda" and they really did it. No story, no script, no built dialogues, no anything!!! - The movie is full of useless sexual connotations with almost every single character that appeared, a son and his father, a 4 years old girl and her parents. It is very obvious that they have nothing to do with the script (assuming there is one asslan) but they are just there to make people "laugh". - The film tackles the issue of the transformation that the after-marriage life of a young couple is subjected to. Don't expect to see anything as serious as the previous sentence, even betrayal, divorce, bringing up kids and child abuse are tackled in a very superficial and childish way! - If I start to mention the number of ethics and values that have been deformed in the movie I need a book, but here are example, the way the married couple deal with each other (two gangsters), the way the children talk to their parents, the way the son talks to his father, the teacher and the way he is portrayed, the neighbors, the caretaker of the building, every single character that appeared in the movie is literally deformed! Finally, I went home, running as much as possible from the cinema and the audience who were laughing their hearts out, cursing every single person i ran into till I went home, wondering what will be the effect of such film on the extremely young children who were in the cinema, I wanted to ask one of the mothers or the fathers "What do you think this film will do to your son or daughter?" but for sure I excluded the idea, if a parent is careless enough to take their child to such movie, for sure any "reasonable" conversation is useless. I cannot blame the filmmakers, they have the "noble" cause of making people "laugh", aren't we experts of making fun of our problems and laughing at ourselves, "ommal nemawet nafsena ya3ny?" I blame the audience- including myself- for going to such movies, wasting time, money and a whole generation of kids. After all, "He who has no audience will never sing again" Finally, I reached the conclusion that this will be the last time in trying to get out of my shell and giving things that I do not like a second chance. I'd rather stay as I am, liking what I like and hating what I hate. And I have to run now to have a big fight with my boss where I will make him regret advising me of "challenging my own staus quo", I love, I adore, I worship my status quo!!!

Sunday, May 31, 2009

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

My Spring!

And if I can't find the colours of spring outside... I bring them in

Sunday, April 05, 2009

Of being "Open Minded"!

A very good friend of mine -actually one of the very few people in my whole life that I can talk freely to knowing that I will never get judged or misunderstood- mentioned that "open minded" has become abused lately and turned to be very vague as it is "sticked" to all kinds of people and actions without really having a solid base upon which it is applied. She also questioned: "What is open-mindedness? Which adjectives fall under its definition? and then... how are they implemented. ..? Or is it just one of those linguistic fashions?" This made me think for a while and then I reached the conclusion that, like any adjective, "open minded" differs according to who says it and who she/he gives it to. So for example such an adjective can be given to a man who does not mind sharing the house work with his wife, a mother who accepts that her daughter goes out with group of friends from both sexes and stays out late, to a man who does not mind that his wife or girlfriend dresses in an exotic way, and it can reach the extreme of giving it to people who do not believe in God or any religion. And of course we have to put in mind the three things that govern our society and become the base of judgement which are religion, traditions and social pressure. Accordingly, a person who breaks some of these rules can be easily called open minded by another person. And again it all depends on who gives the title and to whom. So I think it is like any other adjective, very subjective, you cannot find a single definition or even a group of things that if present in a certain person this person deserves the title, it's like most of the adjectives we use. What is beautiful? What is good life? Who is a happy person? And the list can go for as long as we want. And although some adjectives can be measured like intelligence for example, still the means of measurement differ according to who measures and why is he measuring? I think if you want to minimize your annoyment, whenever you hear this adjective (or any other) being given to someone, just ask the giver of the adjective two questions: 1- What do you mean by open minded? 2- Why do you think X is open minded? It will help you understand the one who gave the adjective, which is really more important than understanding the one who was given it. And believe me you will be shocked how people use words to describe things.

Monday, March 23, 2009

The Windmills of Your Mind

Like a circle in a spiral Like a wheel within a wheel Never ending or beginning On an ever-spinning reel Like a snowball down a mountain Or a carnival balloon Like a carousel that's turning Running rings around the moon Like a clock whose hands are sweeping Past the minutes of its face And the world is like an apple Whirling silently in space Like the circles that you find In the windmills of your mind Like a tunnel that you follow To a tunnel of its own Down a hollow to a cavern Where the sun has never shone Like a door that keeps revolving In a half-forgotten dream Or the ripples from a pebble Someone tosses in a stream Like a clock whose hands are sweeping Past the minutes of its face And the world is like an apple Whirling silently in space Like the circles that you find In the windmills of your mind Keys that jingle in your pocket Words that jangle in your head Why did summer go so quickly? Was it something that you said? Lovers walk along a shore And leave their footprints in the sand Is the sound of distant drumming Just the fingers of your hand? Pictures hanging in a hallway And the fragment of a song Half-remembered names and faces But to whom do they belong? When you knew that it was over You were suddenly aware That the autumn leaves were turning To the colour of her hair Like a circle in a spiral Like a wheel within a wheel Never ending or beginning On an ever-spinning reel As the images unwind Like the circles that you find In the windmills of your mind A song by Noel Harrison from the movie "The Thomas Crown Affair" 1968, that won the Academy Award for Best Original Song in the same year

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

To Look Life in the Face

"To look life in the face... always... to look life in the face... and to know it for what it is... at last... to know it...to love it for what it is... and then... to put it away..." Virginia Woolf

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Life in Venice/The Departure

For the first time he woke up without feeling that thrilling happiness that he has been feeling for the last week. Seven days… seven mornings… he used to wake up very early every day, greeted by the cold air that caresses his face as soon as it gets from under the pillow. Whenever he spends a winter night in Europe, he switches off the heating system and he leaves the windows open, he wants to have "cold" as the first thing to feel and the clean smell of fresh air as the first thing to breath as soon as he wakes up. He ran to the window, the city was still asleep and covered in fog, like a beautiful woman in a French painting from the Nineteenth century, lying elegantly on a love seat, dressed in a transparent veil of white silk that shows its beauty rather than hides it. He breathed the fresh air, carrying the cold of five degrees and the characteristic smell of freshness and cleanliness that he has been absorbing the last week, something he never finds where he comes from. He kept filling his lungs with the air, he wished he can keep the breath inside, he wished he had bigger lungs or his whole body becomes a lung to keep this fresh air inside. What a cruel life, he thought to himself, that makes you see clean air as a dream, even the act of breathing, the most natural and spontaneous right of all living things, is something he cannot enjoy where he lives. A long shower did not help to wash away the layers of sadness that were covering him the more the time flew. His lips that were smiling inevitably for a whole week could not smile now. He had no appetite for breakfast, although during the last seven days he used to eat with an enormous appetite that he gained 3 kilos in only one week. He had packed the night before; he did not want to lose any minute of his last hours in that lovely place. He did the bed and left the room as clean and organized as he once stepped in it a week ago, he knew it's a big hotel where they have a staff whose only job is to do rooms, but he just could not leave anything behind him that does not match with beauty. This room has seen him in happiness for whole week, it deserves to be left as beautiful as it should be, and everything in this city has to carry the word beautiful, strongly and proudly. He dragged his suitcase to leave it in the reception, he was greeted by the beautiful lovely lady that he befriended from the moment he entered for check in. His sadness was obvious and when she told him that she hoped he enjoyed his stay in their hotel, he had a problem speaking, with a gulp in his throat, he said that he enjoyed every minute…that he regretted sleeping for this was a waste of time. And when she apologized because the weather was not good, he interrupted her telling her that it could have never been better, what could be better than a cold cloudy week with showers of rains and blasts of cold air, and all of this contained in a city where the past comes back to life, beautiful and charming, genuine and absorbing. He told her it was his favorite weather, for he comes from a desert, where rain is a rare visitor that visits him few minutes every year, where summer is the most triumphant of the four seasons and where an annoying egotist sun is powerful enough not to allow a single morning to be there without its own presence. He had two hours to spend in the city before his departure, only two hours…how little is that when we are happy. What can be better than walking in a city where walking, the normal and trivial of all acts, can be an enjoyment, where all the streets are cobbled and very clean, the way he likes streets, where all the buildings he comes across are old and clean, the way he likes buildings, where he is surrounded by clean and fresh air that smells of nothing and when it dares carry a smell it is either the smell of the sea, coffee, freshly bakery, frankincense or plants. He kept walking, without his camera, his only companion that did not leave his hand the last week, his final walk was dedicated to his eyes only. He did not take his i-pod as well, who needs music in such walk? He wanted all his senses to absorb as much as possible of this city, even its silence, for he treasures silence as much as he treasures beauty and cleanliness. He wanted to kiss the buildings, to hug them; he wished he could be transformed instantly into a giant, big enough to embrace the whole city with its buildings, canals, islands, bridges. Yes he loves dead things as his closest friend once said, but she did not know that he never saw them as dead, for every building was alive telling him a story, its own story where happiness mingles with grief, creating life the way the wind shapes the sand dunes of the desert where he comes from… Why does everything has to end, why are we lacking the ability to freeze time, to stop life when it should be stopped and where can his life be stopped except in that place? His boat was there, taking him back to the city with its real life, soon he will see cars again, hear their noises and smell the air polluted by their exhaust, soon he will be in an airport, one of the places he hates the most, and soon he will be back to where he came from… The boat was there, he looked back wishing to run away and hide in the city forever, but he did not, he boarded the boat and it started moving triumphantly. The beautiful coast of "Fondamenta Nuova" was getting gradually invisible to his eyes. His vision was blurred, not from the fog that was still covering the city, not from the rain drops that fell on his eye lashes, but from the tears coming from the heart of a man destined to see beauty only where he does not live and feels nostalgic to where he does not belong…

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Life in Venice/ La Traviata

The nineteenth century witnessed a great upheaval of all kinds of art and literature in Europe. It was a century of creativity and thinking, producing works that marked a milestone in the history of humanity. In this time and specifically in France, there lived a famous writer whose father was another famous writer, both father and son gave the French literature masterpieces that cannot be forgotten, both had flamboyant lives that were considered scandalous at that age and both had exactly the same name "Alexander Dumas" The father (1802-1870) wrote The Three Musketeers and The Count of Monte Cristo and was involved with Hashish and other drugs as he was a prominent founder of the "Hashashins club" with other famous writers like the great poet Baudelaire. The son on the other hand was famous for his scandalous affair with Marie Duplessis, a famous courtesan (high class prostitute). This life long relationship inspired Dumas to write his masterpiece La Dame aux camélias, or The Lady of the Camellias, that was first published as a novel in 1848 and then he adapted it for the stage in 1852. The great Italian composer attended the play and got immediately inspired by the story that he made it into the famous opera La Traviata or The Fallen One which premiered in Venice in 1853. ******************** It was my last day in Venice, I dedicated the last evening to this multi level masterpiece, For La Traviata is a masterpiece of music and plot. The show was given in the Scuola Grande San Giovanni Evangelista, one of the many old schools in Venice. Like all the buildings in this enchanted city, the Scuola kept its original architecture, with the magnificently huge Roman facade, the show room that is literally covered by huge paintings all over the walls and the ceilings, and the carved statues in the walls and the ones scattered in every corner. It was a perfect place to see a world famous classical opera as great as La Traviata. Although the original story takes place in nineteenth century France, the opera was adapted to be set in Eighteenth century Italy. We see Violetta, the beautiful courtesan, throwing a party in her home, we get to know the noble Alfredo, a shy gentleman who has been madly but silently in love with Violetta, but he cannot hide his feelings any longer, he confesses his love for her but she rejects him telling him that she was not made to love or be loved by any man, she asks him to forget her and find another woman. But something about Alfredo and his feelings touched her and in a very romantic scene she gives him a red rose and asks him to return it when it has wilted, a symbol of not only the short life of his love for her but of her own life as well. Alone, Violetta cannot remove Alfredo and his voice from her mind, she keeps talking to herself and wondering if he is the man she has always been waiting for. Torn between her attraction to him and the impossibility of being with him, for she is a courtesan and he is a descendant of a noble family. But love wins; Violetta and Alfredo eventually escape and live together in Violetta's country house, enjoying the stolen happiness that they cannot have lawfully. After sometime Alfredo accidentally discovers that Violetta is selling her properties to finance the luxurious life they are both living and he goes back to Paris to claim some money. Waiting desperately for his return, Violetta is visited by the Baron, Alfredo's father who commands her to break her scandalous relationship with his son. Violetta refuses, the Baron offers her money and social protection but Violetta is deeply hurt, she cries while trying to make the father understand that she is not after his money and that she has already been selling her possessing to finance their love, she begs him to allow her some days of happiness in her short life that will end soon. The Baron is deeply touched by the true feelings of Violetta, he begs her to leave his son because their relationship is destroying the family and already preventing his daughter from getting married. Violetta agrees to sacrifice her love for the good of Alfredo and his family. The Baron gives her a fatherly kiss and calls her the noblest of all women. Violetta with unbearable remorse writes a farewell letter to Alfredo while singing of her eternal and unconditional love to him. She gives the letter to her maid to send it to Alfredo who gets devastated when he reads it. Then Violetta is seen in a party, for apparently she has gone back to her life, Alfredo is also there winning a huge sum of money from gambling, he makes a scene and throws the money at Violetta as a payment for her "services", Violetta is deeply humiliated and she faints. In the final scene we see Violtta in her death bed reading a letter from Alfredo's father who heard of her illness and felt so guilty from what he lead her too, he has already confessed to Alfredo the whole story, Alfredo enters and the two lovers sing together their final love song just before Violetta dies in his arms. ************************* Was it the beautiful music of Verdi playing live? Was it the amazing performance and singing of the actors? Was it the breathtaking setting of the ancient place? Was it the extremely beautiful and sad plot with all the emotions it triggered and all the values it resuscitated in my heart and mind? Was it the extremely attractive Soprano who was playing Violetta and exchanging eye contact with me (or so I imagined… hoped actually)? Was it the whole week of being immersed in pure beauty as if the world has forgotten me for whole week in a paradise like place? I wasn't able to identify the real reason for feeling as if I were flying, as if I suddenly left this world and went into a magical journey where everything around you is beautiful in an unearthly way… A dream, a dream that you can touch and live when you are fully wake! How can I explain this? How can a withering plant almost dying in a cracking dry soil explain its feelings when it gets some water carrying the secret of life? How can a weary bird explains how it feels when it finally lands on a solid ground after days and days of flying over the sea? If what I just mentioned got you closer to how it all felt then I have succeeded. I was the last one to leave the place, I didn't want to and it was one of those moments when I wished I could freeze time, I just needed nothing else. It was my last night in Venice, the place that has been treating me well for a whole week, and ended up with this gift. I had my last walk in the empty city, bathing in a sea of serenity, surrounded by the dim light of the street lanterns and a cold breeze of fresh and clean air carrying the smell of the sea and the freshness of winter rain, feeling a strange familiarity with every corner, with every building. Venice loves me, I could feel it, strange and crazy as it might sound but I felt it loved me. With every step I was taking I didn't feel like a foreigner, a tourist who is spending some days of vacation and leaving the next day back to his home, or the place that is supposed to be home… To be continued…

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Life in Venice/ The Colours of Murano

Murano is not just a type of glass, it is considered the most expensive and authentic glass, named after the island where glassmakers reside, adopting ancient methods of blowing and colouring that is living from the thirteenth century till this moment, inherited across families and turning this small island into one of the most frequently visited places in Europe. Not very far from the Venetian coast lies this small island like a beautifully drawn painting, and what is a painting without colors? Venice has always been famous for colored glass that was once called Venetian glass, then in the thirteenth century and due to the fact that most of the houses were made of wood, having those furnaces used for manufacturing the glass made the island at a risk of fire, so the government issued an order that all the glass manufacturers should move to the small island of Murano. Now Murano is a brand, world famous, expensive, luxurious that offers you a wide variety of beautiful products ranging from necklaces, vases, glasses, antiques, chandeliers and all kinds of shapes that can or cannot be made from glass. The island is really small, peaceful, clean, beautiful and elegant, a chip of the old block as they say, for Venice and beauty seem to be eternal companions. As soon as I stepped from the boat, a magnificent composition of blue glass placed in the main street greeted me with a warm welcome in spite of the cold weather. It took me some time to be able to identify exactly what that object was, a collection of narrow hollow tubes of different shades of blue, arranged around several axes and ending up in this conglomerate of gracefully bent tubes, a work of brilliant art, beautiful beyond explanation. I wandered in the empty streets, stopping at each shop, wondering how a human hand can be able of working with such care and producing such beauty from something as fragile and brittle as glass. I decided to enter one of the furnaces and see the process live. Most of the shops refused that, and even refused to allow me to take some photos of their products. Only a young beautiful lady invited me in and took me to the furnace where her father was working. He asked me what do I want, I asked him for a vase, a blue vase. And in front of my eyes, a miracle was happening… I watched the old man working with a speed that my eyes could not follow, I was told that he has to finish in 5 minutes other wise the glass will cool and solidify and cannot be shaped. In less than three minutes, the vase was there, not a plain one, but full of shapes, curves, very unsymmetrical and amazingly beautiful. I was speechless… Was I impressed by the whole atmosphere and how an ugly hot gloomy place like a furnace can be a home for such beauty? Was I impressed by the old man and his super natural speed? Was I impressed by the vase he made in no time, without a previous design, all spontaneous!!! I wanted to stay more and absorb the beauty of the shapes and colors. The lady was nice enough to allow me to take some photos. How did people live without cameras? I toured the island several times, stopping at other shapes placed casually in the streets. A combination of long thin segmented glass shapes that reminded me of sugar cane plantations, but they were colored in red, a graceful shape of curved pieces colored in bright red, orange and yellow, a similar figure with shades of blue and many other breath taking shapes scattered here and there that words cannot explain, I will let the photos show you everything, for some places no words can be able to explain their beauty… I went back to my hotel, with a beautiful vase for my mother, a load of photos in my camera and a lifetime experience that will keep me alive for some time. To be continued…

Monday, March 09, 2009

Life in Venice/ La Gondola

Walking into the narrow streets of Venice and getting close to its marvelous old building is a totally different experience than seeing it from the water, sailing on the famous gondola and watching as the scene changes slowly like a film, like a tray of pictures from a fairy tale book. It was slightly before sunset, the cloudy sky was having that faint orange tint that indicates the approach of sunset in the clear skies of Europe, and of all the European cities that I have visited, clean, organized, civilized as beautiful as they all were, Venice stands alone as a unique individual, around which time had stopped. Even the gondola, that small boat, the only means of transportation in Venice and a very romantic symbol is unique in many ways. The old Gondolier who invited me aboard his gondola or "Deborah" as he calls her, told me many interesting facts about this magical boat.First of all, it is handmade by the assembly of 280 different pieces that come from 8 types of wood. It operates by a single rowing movement and it has an elongated shape that is approximately 10 meters long, the final edges are turned gracefully upwards emphasizing the ancient fairy tale shape. Some years ago the government in Venice issued an order that all gondolas have to be in a specific shape and all coloured in black with beautiful delicate golden decoration. The government also has ordered that all gondoliers should wear a uniform, black trousers and black-stripped white T-shirt. Yes, some governments care about the beauty of their cities and I am certain that a government for a city like Venice should have beauty on top of its Agenda… Let me tell you this, watching a gondola standing in the still water of the canal, swinging gracefully and slowly on the water surface can be nothing but beautiful, I saw it as a princess in an elegant black dress and gold ornaments, waving to her people, inviting in the same time. I boarded the gondola with old "Massimo" the sweet gondolier, listening to his sad and touching story about his gondola and why he calls her "Debora" after his wife who passed away 10 years ago, and after whom he never thought of marrying or even touching another woman, he dedicated his life to take lovers and tour Venice with them, taking them across all the beauties and ending the romantic tour under the bridge of sighs where they kiss and turn their love eternal. When he knew I'm single he was surprised and he asked me I should not waste a single moment in my life without being in love because it is the best thing you can ever do… to be in love. When he asked me where I am from and I told him Egypt, he surprised me with many things he knows about Egypt, he even called me "habibi"! and when the trip ended he refused to take the agreed price and made me a huge discount just for the fact that I am an Egyptian single man who is brave enough to visit Venice alone and loving it non the less. Sometimes being Egyptian ends up in something good…Sometimes… To be continued…

Sunday, March 08, 2009

Life in Venice/ The Accademia

The Accademia as it is commonly called or L'Accademia di Belle Arti di Venezia as it is properly called in Italian is one of the world's most renowned art galleries that hosts one of the finest collections of Italian paintings dated to the pre-1800s. It was founded originally as a school for fine arts; painting, sculpture and architecture. It is a huge building located on the Grand Canal, the main canal crossing Venice and it was originally three separate buildings that were combined and turned into this magnificently huge art gallery in the eighteenth century. Among the great work of arts that the Accademia hosts, the most famous of all is Da Vinci's "Vetruvian Man" (attached) which is a masterpiece of art and science and contains many secrets of geometry. Entering the huge gate after a warm welcome by a typical Roman façade, I kept moving smoothly from one room to another, trying to absorb the immense paintings with all their details, starting with very early Christian art and ending with beautiful sceneries. After some time, I just had some difficulty trying to lift my lower jaw placing it back in its proper place. It was inevitable…I was wondering how can a single artist, a man, just another human being, how can he be able to work on such huge paintings and I mean huge, with all the details, the facial expressions, the background and its full assembly of things… It was just unbelievable…I am talking about Bellini, one of the great Italian painters, a Venetian who needs a post of his own (which will come later on among other Venetians, promise), a painter who was fascinated by the Virgin and Jesus, capturing the most emotionally intense moments in their lives with beauty that words cannot describe… Many questions were left unanswered in my poor mind that has been subjected to a brutal culture shock as soon as I landed in this magnificent city which is a work of art itself. I tried to pick one of the huge paintings randomly and I tried to imagine the painter standing in front of a plain wall. Did he have the whole scene in mind before starting or he just made it up as soon as he hit the wall with his brush? Where did he start with his brush? Which color did he use? How did he manage to complete such a huge work? How did he manage to take breaks and come back to work on the very same part? After some time, I was exhausted… drained, I just couldn't stay more in that place, I was really saturated from the huge works and this beauty that my eyes could not capture more and my heart had no place for more awe… I went out, breathing the cold air with its characteristic freshness… Just across the channel I was invited to a Gondola by a very cheerful old man who insisted that he will take me to a tour in Venice as seeing it from the water is different than seeing it from the land, I couldn't agree more… To be continued…